covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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