That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Randomize
