Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Randomize
