we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
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