I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
