Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Drake has all the answers
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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