so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
