roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
