had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
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