She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
We talked him into tasing himself.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
