Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
