i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
