your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
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