its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
