dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
