I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
