I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Randomize
