i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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