Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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