I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Farmville is her only friend.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Randomize
