We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize