I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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