Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
