I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
