I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
