i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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