i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
