also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
