all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
