If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize