so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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