let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
