The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
