Dual....:-)
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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