Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
