I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
