I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize