margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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