new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
