i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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