oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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