Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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