Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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