You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
handjob tips. give me some.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
