bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
