New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
