i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Randomize
