Don't make out with my wife yet
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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