Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
