i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
