the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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