Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
